Power Rankings can be really stupid. So stupid that The No-Look Pass just had to have “Stupid Power Rankings.”
This feature is usually on every Monday. Disagree with the rankings? Well, we already prefaced that these are stupid. Just have fun with these as I rank these however I feel where they stupidly belong.
(PHOTO CREDIT: Gus Chan/Cleveland Plain Dealer.)
1) Ring Night
Ring Nights are always special. I always have the fuzzies when I see the city celebrate a ring ceremony and a raising of a title banner for their professional basketball team. It brings the city together for that hour and it’s even better if they punctuate the night with a victory in their season opener.
It’s extra special for Cleveland because it’s a city that hadn’t won a pro sports championship in like 500 years (okay, it’s really 52 years). The Cavs broke that drought in an improbable comeback as the Warriors… you know what they did.
And Cleveland might be continuing this celebration. As of now, their Major League Baseball team is one win away from winning the World Series. Now if the Browns can even win one game…
(PHOTO CREDIT: Sarah Phipps/The Oklahoman.)
2) Russell Westbrook Destruction Tour
What do you do when someone breaks up with you? You can pretend that nothing’s wrong until you break and do one of these things I’m about to mention. Or you can be sad and eat all the ice cream you want. Or you can change your look completely to the point where you look unrecognizable.
Or you can be angry at the world and destroy everything.
That’s what the jilted Russell Westbrook is doing. He’s led the Thunder to a furious 3-0 start and his statline is even more ferocious.
38.7 points, 12.3 rebounds, 11.7 assists.
That’s INCREDIBLE. Also, he would have three triple-doubles but he fell one assist short against the Philadelphia 76ers.
I wish I handled a break-up like Russ is doing right now.
(PHOTO CREDIT: Tom Reel/San Antonio Express-News.)
3) The Silence of the Spurs
Many people said that the NBA title is between the Golden State Warriors and the defending champions Cleveland Cavaliers. And then the consistent San Antonio Spurs, now without legend Tim Duncan, went into Oracle and plastered the Dubs on Opening Night. They also went on to beat the Kings, Pelicans, and Heat later in the week. The machine just keeps on turning in San Antonio.
Also, Kawhi Leonard is frightening. He is the perfect heir apparent (which we’ve said tons of times) to take over the franchise. He defends like mad and has evolved as a deadly scorer and shooter. And he’s doing it while he has the demeanor of a guy waiting in line at the DMV.
4) Dogs In Costumes
It’s Halloween today. While some humans are out there offending people with their inappropriate costumes, you can’t possibly go wrong with dogs dressing up. I think.
Here’s my monster attempting to be a busy bee in the picture above.
(PHOTO CREDIT: David Zalubowski/AP.)
5) Dame Over
Damian Lillard made it known that he is aiming for the MVP award. Warriors coach Steve Kerr thinks he’s going to win it. Can’t argue with the numbers. Damian is averaging 35.0 points, 8.0 rebounds, and 5.3 assists after three games. Also, he made the game-tying lay-up to send the game to OT against Denver and then he converted a smooth floater with 0.3 seconds left to later win the game.
Portland didn’t have a perfect week; they lost against the Clippers. But it’s tough to ignore what Lillard is doing.
(PHOTO CREDIT: Michael DeMocker/Times-Picayune.)
6) Just Brow-sing
So Anthony Davis went off for 50 and 15 against the Nuggets and THEN he put up 45 and 17 against the Dubs. Those are MONSTER numbers to start the season.
He did slow down against the Spurs with just 18 points and 5 boards but I feel we’ll see more of the first two games than this one.
(PHOTO CREDIT: Matt Dunham/AP.)
7) Draw Games in NFL
The NFL’s ratings are down. The quality is down. They don’t seem to care a great deal about humans, either, as they feel touchdown celebrations are worse than women getting beat.
And the circus continues in the NFL as they had TWO games that ended in a draw for two weeks in a row. We had that awful Seahawks/Cardinals Sunday night game last week that finished in a 6-6 deadlock. And then the teams from D.C. and Cincy ended in a 27-27 tie. All because these kickers can’t convert what are supposed to be short field goals.
Actually, these might be the best things going on in the NFL at the moment. At least, tied games get a chuckle out of me.
(PHOTO CREDIT: Armando L. Sanchez/Chicago Tribune.)
8) Dwyane Wade is Shooting Threes
First off, it’s really weird that Wade is playing for the Chicago Bulls instead of the familiar Miami Heat. Then he came out shooting threes against Boston as he went for 4 for 6. If this is the game plan moving forward, I am not super confident in it.
With that said, he didn’t shoot any treys against Indiana and they won that game. Well, maybe he’ll continue to be selective but the Bulls need shooting badly to keep themselves competitive.
I am fearful so I have Wade low in my stupid rankings.
(VIDEO CREDIT: NBA.)
9) Nikola Vucevic Is Not Having A Good Week
For all intents and purposes, his stats aren’t the worst (11.7 points, 12.3 boards) but his team (the Magic) is 0-3 and he got dunked on by LeBron James. And when you get dunked on, you’ll get a lot of reminders about it for the next few days, and it almost doesn’t matter how your statline is.
I know. I’m one of those guys that helps pour some more salt on the wound. Sorry, Nikola.
First the clocks, now this? @Suns pic.twitter.com/bqFI9TxkMb
— Jordan Ramirez (@JRAM_91) October 30, 2016
10) Spell Bledsoe
The Suns just can’t win.
Follow Rey-Rey on Twitter at @TheNoLookPass for all tweets about the NBA and terrible pop music. Also, check out his podcast, Rey-Rey Is Fundamental.
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